Every thought and curiosity; every confession and self reflection; every crush and heartbreak; every daydream and plan-for and fantasy; every hate and shame. From whimsy to grand scheme, all had been transcribed meticulously into a journal. It held the culmination of the last year. It lived in a carryall during the day and beside the bed at night. And then just like that -in a snap, it got left behind on a bus. She would never see it again. She felt raw, like she had been folded inside-out. She cried for days. This was the most mortifying thing she could’ve imagined. ~~~ Amber’s phone is plugged into an outlet on the bathroom counter while she showers. There had been a … Read More
Sleepovers
Her house is the house. Anyone can show up; anyone can stay. And that’s the draw. But more have shown up this time than ever before and it’s a bit overwhelming. Elbow to elbow, full of body heat. Loud. So loud. Between the energy of the crowd and the bouncing music, the house can appear as if it’s pulsing. She runs through the rooms making sure people are keeping their shit contained. How the hell does she always wake up to a clean house after these parties? They respect! They are not allowed if they don’t. She scolds with the quick. The house is small and she runs a tight ship. She cracks the whip, ‘Empty your ashtrays! Throw your beer cans … Read More
California Cool
The airport is small and local. She exits into a sunny side of life, inhaling smells of lilac and lemon trees. The clean pavement reflects gold rays back to her as she makes her way to one of the few waiting taxis. There would only be a few. It’s about a twenty-minute drive to the house, and after exiting the freeway, the neighborhoods lining the coast all seem private, secluded. The houses are individually wrapped by bundles of trees and beds of flowers. Something ideal. The driver turns off one of the winding roads onto a small gravel patch. The crunch under the tires announcing her arrival. A gathering of trees line either side of an iron gate. She gets out … Read More
In the Rain
I had barely arrived at the hotel before being whisked away. Anticipation and trepidation. I had come from a meeting, right off a flight, wearing business slacks and such. After freshening, I opted for jeans with a blouse and cardigan. I threw on some slick new trainers, because shoes always elicit your attention. I also figured practical was best; not knowing how much walking the evening would entail or how cool the weather would turn. The hotel had an old-world aesthetic and regality, but the carpeted stair runner had a musty smell under each step. A once-over with the vacuum would spruce it up, I thought. My senses seemed to be moving back in time as I descended to the lobby. You … Read More
When Things Change
When corporate sweeps in and takes over the individually owned, bootstrapped and personally branded company, all the dynamism in the office shifts. Office politics are introduced. The established camaraderie, the last-minute office happy hours, the provocative holiday parties, now interrupted by the HR machine. Ironically, the watching of sexual harassment videos and other procedural items are outsourced to the assistants. The staff aren’t the ones ‘…bringing in the fucking money. I don’t have time for this!’ Before, the deals were done under the aura and vulgarity of a frat house; now everyone is an independent contractor with new titles and a different hierarchy, watching their backs. The rest of the staff edit their casual conversation topics and spend less time lingering at the … Read More