On Reading

BrockaBooks, PoemsLeave a Comment

It seemed fascinating and titillating. Reading romance novels at the mature old age of ten. My mother had no issue with it. We would actually lie on her bed after a trip to the library and spread out our haul: mysteries; how-tos; self-help. She loved to be read to and was particularly fond of Danielle Steel at the time, so I became the narrator of these overwrought family sagas, affairs, and marital disputes. I presume these themes still drive Danielle Steel books. I never read the more sexually driven scenes out loud; that would’ve been mortifying.   Around this same time in elementary school, there were a few book nerds I knew of on the periphery; these were the ones always reading, and always reading unassigned material. Two … Read More

BrockaOn Reading

Lust

BrockaRelationships1 Comment

Lust is temporary insanity. – Brocka, 2001  This line sounds like it was stolen from a book or from a tv drama. Maybe so. But the way I noted it and the old piece of paper it was written on leads me to believe I thought it original at the time.   I’ve been doing this for twenty-five years now. Keeping journals, keeping notes, writing music, writing poems. I’ve gotten my rolodex well organized at this point; the themes are consolidated. ~Love and lust and its delusory effects~  It is not possible for anything new to be felt or written or sung about love. Rephrased, sure. Varying intensity levels, absolutely. I may have stolen the line. At least I knew it was … Read More

BrockaLust

On Permanence

BrockaRelationships, WorkLeave a Comment

Piecing some of today together. Having just returned from brunch, I admire how conversations with friends dive deep immediately. We discuss permanence; whether to stay or go.  I’ve always scoffed at permanence. Having to choose a tattoo sounds like punishment. The thought of not being able to change my mind feels suffocating. I’ve even found myself unfollowing people on twitter simply because they make blanket, dogmatic personal statements; as if there can be no deviation; as if generalities don’t exist. We get too locked in. Sometimes we get complacent.   Yet here I am in the city I’ve lived my entire life. We grow up and everything old no longer fits. It becomes too tight and too stifling. So why linger in a … Read More

BrockaOn Permanence

Folly of Youth

BrockaPoems, RelationshipsLeave a Comment

A street of houses sits facing an open field with numerous trees. The trees are dense with leaves, and the branches and twigs stretch far out creating a canopy affect. To catch a glimpse through a front window is to sense a private forest. Two tween girls attending the same school happen to be neighbors on this street. They’re more acquaintances than friends. Their social circles are different, and one is particularly snobby with her book reading addiction and proper use of grammar. She’s known to obnoxiously correct most in their class. ‘Don’t finish a sentence with a preposition,’ is a fav. We see how that turned out. How some pronounced worry and lawyer was particularly vexing. Maybe a product of proximity, and the shared status … Read More

BrockaFolly of Youth

Fire Damage

BrockaHistory, Short StoriesLeave a Comment

I have many stories around the themes of fire and smoke. The fears of being burned or catching fire; the costs to items and to lives; the lingering smells of fire damage. Memories can return with the strike of a match.   The master bedroom sits at the end of a long, carpeted hallway. The door is always left wide open, except for bedtime. One has direct sight into the room. In front of a window, a standing bust is situated between the foot of the bed and the closets. Draped on this headless mannequin is an off-white, vintage Victorian wedding dress. Close inspection reveals exquisite lace work, intricate layering, and detailed pearl beading around the neck and down the arms. … Read More

BrockaFire Damage