Equanimity

BrockaTechnology, WorkLeave a Comment

NOUN :mental calmness, composure, and evenness of temper, especially in a difficult situation I would propose most stress and the entire sense of being rushed is self-induced. We have an I.T. guy who comes to our office twice a week. Necessary. There’s big stuff like managing servers and small stuff like managing personalities whom freak out over small stuff like it’s big. Bless his heart. His disposition is consistently calm which is well-suited to the position. Don’t we all live with an expectation now of how things should work? Do you remember dial-up?! These minor delays and inconveniences try to upend good moods or entire days. I find it comical how our hysteria doesn’t correlate with how well and easy we actually have it. Our frustration seems incongruous … Read More

BrockaEquanimity

Ode to Sleep

BrockaHealth & Wellness, Mood Room, MusicLeave a Comment

From where I sit: I’ve slept ~6 hours in the last two nights, each. This.is.no.bueno.for.me. Zombie-esque. 7.5 hours is my minimum. I hate everything otherwise! I don’t verbalize it as such, but I think it. I think it so hard. I am concrete being drug through mud. Over the years, under the guise of this fog, I’ve made objective observations. The experience has repeated itself enough, I can somewhat rise above it. There’s always the general anger over the circumstance; the physical ache within my self, my body; the negative thoughts…The real fist punches are the negative thoughts. Now an observer of them, I can classify them as ‘other’, as apart from me and very circumstantial. I’ve learned to overcome … Read More

BrockaOde to Sleep

Time to Think

BrockaHealth & Wellness, WorkLeave a Comment

I got off work early Friday, grateful. In the last few days, all of my immediate need-to-do and want-to-accomplish have been met. A random question popped in my mind, a ping of curiosity. The first time I sat in meditation at 8 years old, how-WHY did I come to do so? Why the seated position, the deliberate spine structure, why the darkness and focus on breath… I have wondered what propelled me, what instigated the behavior, the influence I was under. Had I read, seen, or heard something? Yes, most probably. But it’s been 4 days, and I have no particular clarity. We are so susceptible at certain moments in our rearing. Consequences we can’t fathom yet feel daily. Maybe … Read More

BrockaTime to Think