One of the least selfish things a person can do is have a child. Raising a child is the most self-less experience we go through. Every decision, from the day the baby is born, is no longer about the parents interest but that of nurturing the baby. (pre-supposing a mature parent, not a knocked-up immature teenager) We live in a society now that gives woman both the time and opportunity to have both a career and a child, or have a child and still participate in all the extra-curricular fun, hobbies or passions she chooses.
But some people know full and well, they don’t want kids. It’s a lifestyle choice like any other. It needs no defense. So what I have come to believe, if a parent now has the means to multi-task a life of selflessness AND selfishness, a childless adult has even less excuse to not find some other selfless, expressive endeavor. Without the responsibilities of rearing, it becomes even more paramount to find something else to nurture and grow outside of ourselves, because too much ‘me, me, me’ becomes very shallow. Every day we wake up, all the decisions (parentless) are about my schedule, my responsibilties, my food, my social life or my relaxation time. When we extend ourselves beyond our own agenda by expressing our talents, or sharing our skills with other people, or manifesting things we are passionate about, it will make for a fuller life.
The other night when I was speaking in front of large group of woman, I was nervous. Like any public exposure or performance, this is par for course. But what the presenter needs to remember, the audience is there for the performance or the message or the experience. The audience wants you to succeed! They don’t want you to fail. More importantly, the world wants you to succeed. Which means all the insecurities or justifications we can come up with for not nurturing our own talents and exposing them to whomever (as few as our nearest friends or as many as can view a youtube page) are just that, excuses! Excuses are selfish. Excuses keep you from being real. And just like raising a child, you can not put off for very long not changing a babies diaper. In the same vein, you can’t keep suppressing your own passions because things become just as toxic inside. It is very selfish for anyone to not share a trait, talent, skill or knowledge they possess. Remember, everybody wants you to succeed. Everyone has something unique they can do, say, give or make. Whatever you are interested in, nurture it, and share it; that is all.