Bailing

BrockaMood RoomLeave a Comment

An appropriate segue with from the last post:

I jumped ship off that baking business. Was it because I didn’t want to put in the continuous hard work to make it something better, more exceptional?

I’m wanting to bail on this second song I’m currently in the studio producing. Everything lyrically has been reorganized and changed; it is not -at all- going where i thought it would. I can’t firmly say i hate it yet, but time is money. I will know definitively by Thursday. I hinted to the producer Monday about just shelving it, just starting another song i have ready. I was going very avant-garde. Fuck it, this is for me! He proposed structuring it commercially. Sure I want the listener to like it, but do I really care what you think?

Frankly, am I wanting to bail because it is getting difficult? That’s the money question.

In the similar vein, I just cordially resolved an intimate relationship, mainly based off big incompatibilities.

I got my usual Sunday routine email newsletter via Maria Popova, coincidentally the morning after this decision-demise. (if you are any kind of reader of big internal reflection or debate, subscribe!) The first big headlined topic is How Differences Bring Couples Closer Together First thought honestly, well fuck :/

And I question myself again, did I bail because it got difficult?

Personal evolution is being able to ask yourself these types of questions, to acknowledge weaknesses, to be willing to push through the hard work. Wisdom is knowing when to bail AND not beat yourself up over it.

 

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